Don’t Be a Bug-A-Boo

October 17, 2018


“No matter how many times you diss ’em, they still want to get witcha
continuously callin never givin you a rest
A Bug-A-Boo’s just like a fly…
Nothing but a pest, and I suggest
That you step, why?
Cause you’re a Bug-A-Boo, you’re buggin me (I’m buggin who?)
You’re just a Bug-A-Boo, you’re buggin me (I’m buggin who?)
You’re just a Bug-A-Boo, you’re buggin me (I’m buggin who?)
You’re just a Bug-A-Boo…”
(Anderson, E., 1991)


A job seeker reached out to me for assistance with a job offer negotiation.  Normally I slow-roll people who attempt to hijack my time by sending multiple messages on various platforms without giving me time to respond to the first attempt at contact.  To add insult to injury this is someone who ONLY communicates with me directly when they have questions relating to their career search.

Instead of going with my first instinct and ignoring them until I had time, or better yet, until they notified me that someone else provided assistance, I responded to one of the messages.  In an effort to set boundaries, I denied the opportunity to speak on the phone in favor of communicating digitally.

The job seeker was concerned that he/she was unable to reach the recruiter who had extended an offer for a job that he/she REALLY wanted.  While reading the backstory story alarm bells were ringing, warning lights were flashing, and red flags were waving. I asked a few probing questions for clarification’s sake and discovered that there wasn’t an offer extended and the recruiter had actually sent correspondence closing the loop.

I explained that from the recruiter’s perspective there was no further discussion to be had with regards to the position.  I advised him/her to let it go and that the behavior would burn a bridge, exclude him/her from being considered for future positions, and was bordering on harassment.

There’s a difference between persistence and pestering.  If you aren’t offered a position it’s OK to request feedback that you can use for future opportunities. It’s also OK to express your desire to network in the future and maintain a professional relationship with the recruiter.

But, if you

  • Incessantly call, email, text, and direct message in rapid succession
  • Stalk on social media
  • Snitch to other recruiters in the company or the recruiter’s manager/supervisor
  • Circumvent the recruiter and reach out to the hiring manager directly
  • Bad mouth them just because you can’t accept that you didn’t get the job and/or
  • Try to manipulate another recruiter in your professional network to intervene on your behalf…